This may be a little darker and a little more poetic than my last blog entry. But you know me by now, at least a little and you know I jump between moods and thoughts. And this is to express how it feels sometimes. So, don't read too much into this! It is not a description.
Touch me, I am lonely!
Come and love me, I am lonely! I am in darkness, I can't see you. Love me!
See me, my love, see me! Look at me and see me! I am invisible.
Let me be, who I am. Come and love me! I need you now. I am nothing, love me for being nothing.
I am angry now, I am sad and angry and I want to be loved. Love me! Touch me!
Don't ask me to love you, don't ask me to see you. I am blind and I am cold, cold as dead. I can do nothing. I can say nothing. I am empty, spent and tired to my bones. I am exhausted, lost and scared. I am tired. To the core of my being I am tired. I have struggled, I have fought but I want no more wars, no more fights.
Love me! Touch me!
Touch me and make me feel beautiful. I want to be beautiful. I want to feel life.
Oh, how sweet it would be to be touched by you. How beautiful I would be in your embrace, in your love. Come and love me for I am lonely!
Janice, lonely is bad, I know.
ReplyDeleteI know, not reality, poetry.
Thank you for sharing.
Oh, my dear Janice, I shouldn't have read this one at work. It made me weep. Sad, poignant it hurt to read. Beautifully written as always.
ReplyDeleteBig Hugs
Dove
Your honesty is searing.
ReplyDeleteIt touches me -- I mean tangibly, not as metaphor.
It touches all those who read it -- we all understand.
Is such honesty also liberating?
Do you, Janice, feel comforted,saying this -- this prayer -- and releasing it, as into a breeze?
I hope your prayer is answered -- and all our prayers.
Paul, Dove, Wystan, I thank you for your comments. It is liberating to write, and it always is, not only when I write painful things like this. But remember, dark feelings are like ogres and trolls, they melt in the sun! I am not always in that dark place and writing is a way, sometimes, to approach the darkness in my heart, in an orderly fashion. So, dear friends, don't read too much into this, although, I am quite proud I managed to touch you with my scribblings!
ReplyDeleteJanice
Strange and Imaginary