So, here is something I have been meaning to ask you, dear Readers. I may be a bit preoccupied with fantasies and the role they play in my life. I can't help being fascinated and intrigued. I get the impression, sometimes, that fantasies have a different function for some people I communicate with.
So, my question to you is this. What are fantasies to you? Are they just a nice pastime, something you do when you have nothing else to do? Or are they something you use to, well, get in the mood, whether you are alone or with someone? Is it part of your lifestyle, something that fills you day? In short what role do fantasies play in your life, how important are they?
I will leave it at that and hope for some replies. Take care dear Readers! And be kind to yourself!
11 comments:
Thanks for asking, Janice. What’s wrong with being preoccupied with fantasies?
A few years ago, I would have answered ‘Yes’ to the first two questions (are fantasies a nice pastime, and do they get me in the mood?) and ‘No’ to the third (are fantasies part of my lifestyle?). But now it would be ‘No’ to the first question and ‘Yes’ to two and three. In short, fantasies are very important to me. And I’m happier now than I was when I would have answered your questions differently. Here’s another little bit of information: my pre-occupying fantasy is ‘a slave girl’s journey’ (such as that you so brilliantly began in ‘Slave Story’); my kick-off fantasy is more likely to be a D/s punishment scene.
Hope the survey goes well.
It’s great to have you back – I’m looking forward to new stories (and maybe continuations of a couple of others) when the goddesses sing to you.
Hugs
Michael
Janice, when I was young fantasies were very important, I filled many note books with them, when I married I disposed of them, I wish I hadn't now.
Fantasies played an important role in our sex life during my marriage.
In my youth my fantasies were very edgy, some even impossible.
In marriage the fantasies were doable if edgy.
Now my fantasies are gentler but still important.
I believe that a human without fantasy is barely human, indeed I've never met one.
To answer your question, imagination = fantasy, and so very important, squared!!
Warm hugs,
Paul.
Janice,
For me it depends how I am feeling at the time. Fantasies are something that always seem to be with me and are used for various things. Yes, sometimes to 'get me in the mood' as you put it but more often they are like daydreams that I flit in and out of throughout the day.
Sometimes they are small scenarios, sometimes whole stories. At times things just pop into my head and can be used for stories other things I keep for myself.
So for me fantasies are something I live with most of the time and I have always thought of it as my mind wandering. One minute I am working out on the treadmill, the next minute I am shooting across the galaxy fighting space pirates.
Curiously of late, due to more stress in my life than usual, my fantasy world has taken a back seat so to speak. I have needed to concentrate more on the real world and stay in focus. At the moment that is needed but takes more energy. Odd.
Hugs
Mina
Hi Janice,
Welcome back. I am glad that I found your blog. I really enjoy your fantasies.
Since childhood fantasies have taken me away from boring, routine and uneventful days. They fill in a need in my life where physically or realistically I cannot fulfill them at the time.
I believe they are driven by how my brain is formed. My artistic right brain and my tactile learning style drive me to always do something with my hands and fantasies take me places where I can do anything, mostly tying women and torturing them with pleasure and a little pain.
Even before I knew what sex was I fantasized about tied women. I got excited but not sexually. Now fantasies get me in the mood very quickly.
Now that I am married, my wife and I play out some of these fantasies and somewhat they have become part of our lifestyle. The interesting thing is that the mind does not need too much reality to feel that a fantasy is real. What I mean is even light symbolic bondage may seem like an inescapable restraint if you let your imagination run wild. So the transition from fantasy to reality is not as difficult as you might think.
I enjoy fantasies that have bondage, submission, slavery, spanking, punishment, and damsels in distress but not cruelty, no gruesome treatment of people and animals, no disfiguring of women's beautiful sexy bodies. Your stories tickle my fantasies just right. Keep up the good work.
Love
Touareg
Dear Michael, I hope there is nothing wrong with being preoccupied with fantasies, maybe it is not good to be too preoccupied, though. And thank you for your reply. I definitely live in my head so in a way it is part of my lifestyle but not in any straightforward way.
Dear Paul, I can relate to what you say, to some extent. I have become nicer with age. I mean in my fantasies. I am more concerned with relations and people and emotions now.
Dear Mina, are we the same kind of dreamers? '...something I live with most of the time...' I could have said that myself. And I also find that when I am stressed and sad fantasies don't work as well.
Dear Touareg, it is the same for me, I have had my fantasies for ages in one form or the other. I think your words on fantasies as parts of real life events ring true. Thanks for stopping by.
Hugs and thanks for your replies.
Janice
Like others who have commented, my darker fantasy life began early -- inspired (but not, I think, created by) movies of slaves, harems, and the whipping or torture of noble females (The Viking Queen, the Adventures of Aladdin)) or miserable slaves (the Mole Men, the Face of Fu Manchu).
My dark fantasies are more urgent, and more intense, when I am under stress. After a trying day at work, or a tiff at home, I savor the image of a bound girl, before whom I brandish the lash. Oddly, I do not see a pattern in her response (stoic acceptance, loving endurance, furious resistance, or abject pleading). Whatever she offers suits me -- and other reactions are, at the moment, less interesting.
Marcus
Sorry to have been late on this one Janice.
My position is similar to Wilhelmina's in that the fantasy is a chance to spend a little time in a place apart from the real world, in a scenario entirely of my own making.
Writing fiction helps me to make them more real, the characters are often ciphers for me as I consider a subject or a situation which is either too outrageous to exist in reality or just that even though the scene is possible I know I am never going to participate in it in real life.
In bed of course, the fantasy helps to maintain or stimulate arousal, which sadly becomes more necessary with the predations of Anno Domini.
Dear Marcus, I recognise what you said about films and such, that it strikes a chord and inspires but they are perhaps not the reason. That runs deeper. For me it is the opposite, I have more fantasies when I am happy...isn't that strange?
Dear Ollie, thanks for that. I too find it very rewarding to, sort of, explore a strange subject in a story or the like.
Hugs
Janice
Dear Janice,
We all have fantasies,often the safest way to explore our darkest desires is through them.But I think it's a shame to live in total fantasy.
I'm a BDSM person,and try to play out those that I can.Some can't be lived of course,so I have a few I find arousing.Your writing is great,and I love the way you cast yourself in the role of the sufferer.For someone who doesn't play in BDSM,you are very accurate in portraying the feelings involved.
Regards,
Kydog
Dear Kydog, thank you for your comment. And the compliment...smiles. I will however say one thing. You say it is a shame to live in total fantasy. Thing is that I have become far happier when I have accepted I am a dreamer and not so much tries to think of fantasies as something that has to be realised. So, I am, actually happy living in my head.
Hugs
Janice
I find that fantasies have been a way for me to increase my self confidence. They have been a platform from which my Disciplinarian and I can communicate in a wonderful array of ways, and explore different expressions of our sexuality's.
They tap into both imagination, creativity and communication, as well as requiring some bravery at times and playfulness. All things that I believe are important.
We have definitely found that some fantasies have been much better staying as fantasies, but more often have found that the opposite is true!
Olivia
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