Wednesday, 21 November 2007

It Is Not Real...

I had planned to put a story up on my blog but that will have to wait. Today I want to tell you about my second life, in Second Life (SL). I have done it before but it is not often and far between times. I will tell you a little about me in SL. In that virtual world I am Janice Aldwych, also called Pipit. As you may have figured out I am a spanko and quite submissive.

Yesterday I broke up with my mistress in SL. We had been together for five months but for four days. That is quite a long time in SL, as I understand it. I took the step. I decided to leave and return my collar. That is how it is done. I felt we couldn't communicate the way I needed. I still love her and care for her and I think it was me rather than her that couldn't cope. She accepted it with grace and we are still friends. I am proud of her.

That which I want to tell you is that I am very sad now. It is strange how a virtual world can affect you...or me, at least. I think of it as a book or a film I co-write with all the other inhabitants of SL and a good book or film may move you to tears. Maybe it isn't so strange to be affected, after all.

Part of me regret leaving my mistress. I have been immensely proud of wearing her collar. It has been the most precious thing. Anyone who have read my earlier posts knows that I had a secondary owner too and returning their collar means I am not hers any more, either.

I feel naked now, without their collar. I feel lost and abandoned but I am my own now. I may find another mistress, in fact there is someone who has volunteered but we will see what happens.

I feel I am overly dramatic about this and I don't expect anyone to understand how it can affect me this way. Still I was close to tears yesterday and I am sad now as I write this. It is the end of an era and it hurts, even if that era was a virtual one.

Thank you for reading, dear Reader.


Dove said...

Dear Janice, it was a big step to take and, it seems, a right one. Well done for being brave because although it is a virtual world you are still interacting with other humans and all there emotions. I know it made you sad but I do hope soon you will be happier for it. One day I will manage to give you a real Janus hug too.


Janice said...

Dear Dove, you are right, there are others there as well and to some extent the relationships are real but they will not be more than Second Life relationships, unless you want that. A kind of in between reality and fiction.

Marcus Amenophis said...

What is real? Your SL avatar -- isn't she in some way real? Does she, perhaps, feel the experience was real -- feel it more keenly, perhaps, than you, even?

Anonymous said...

Everything is born, grown and dies... Everything, including the story we are living at the moment.
I liked an hated this post, it makes me think of my very recent history. I'm so much afraid of this (second) life witch renews itself at all times...

Love you Janice.